Supporting a survivor or someone at risk of HBA/FM can be daunting especially when it is someone close to you and you are worried about saying or doing "the wrong thing." You don't have to be an expert to support someone but there are some really simple things you can do that will help
Looking out for Friends and Peers
Assess their safety: Are they or others in imminent danger? If so, escalate to the emergency services by contacting 999. If you are concerns about their risk, seek advise yourself.
Medical needs: Do they have medical needs that require attention?
Listen: If someone discloses an experience of bullying or harassment to you, listening to what they tell with no judgment, compassion and empathy can be incredibly helpful.
Believe: Rather than asking a lot of questions, just let them know that you believe them and will support them as best as you can. Ensure you are non-judgemental, reassuring and supportive . Use phrases such as:
“I believe you. / It took a lot of courage to tell me about this.”
“It’s not your fault. / You didn’t do anything to deserve this.”
“You are not alone. / I care about you and am here to listen or help in any way I can.”
“I’m sorry this happened. / This shouldn’t have happened to you.”
Reassure and give options: Remind them that it is not their fault. Give them options about what they want to do - you can simply ask them what they need or want.
Encouraging independence: Helping your friend develop their own problem-solving skills and encouraging them to take ownership of their decisions.
Respecting their choices: Supporting their choices and decisions, even if you don't agree with them, while respecting their autonomy.
Setting boundaries: Setting boundaries to protect your own emotional well-being and preventing burnout from over-involvement.
Mutual support: Being there for each other, sharing experiences, and offering encouragement.
Self care support:
It is also important that you know how to look after yourself. Managing self-care while dealing with disclosures involves balancing empathy for others with maintaining your own wellbeing, which is just as important, and the impact of this will vary from person to person.
Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques - Mindfulness for mental wellbeing | NHS inform
Engage in Activities You Enjoy - How to be happier - NHS
Reflect and Journal - The Power of Journaling for Mental Health
Engage in Physical Activity - How are physical activity and mental health connected | Mind
Stay Connected - Top tips on how to stay connected
Further resource and referral information can be found on the It has happened to me and Support resources pages .